GGN Publisher, Shaun Proulx speaks with long-term survivors, Shari Margolese and Ron Rosenes, two legends in the HIV/AIDS world who share chilling comparisons between the AIDS pandemic and COVID-19, as well as the lessons we can learn and apply to COVID-19 from what we learned from AIDS. It’s a COVID-19 conversation you’ve not heard before.  

The post GGN Radio :: Chilling Comparisons Between the HIV/AIDS & COVID-19 Pandemics appeared first on TheGayGuideNetwork.com.

Haven’t We Been Here Before?

In this special edition of the Think Queerly Podcast, show host Darren Stehle speaks with friend and colleague, GGN Publisher Shaun Proulx about the issue of shaming and judgment of those who are choosing (and needing) to have sex during the COVID-19 pandemic and social quarantine.

Darren and Shaun get into the various contrasts we are witnessing in human behaviour during the COVID-19 pandemic and why that reminds of our own experiences having lived through the very beginnings of the HIV/AIDS epidemic in the 1980s.

We discuss the layers of shame, including gay shame, bareback shaming from the early days of AIDS and eating our own — how marginalized groups are often more judgmental of their own, which further exacerbates feelings of shame and a lack of belonging and acceptance. Shaun drives home the point that this is a conversation for everyone who has sex, not just gay men. Everyone needs to hear this message and have this conversation.

Darren talks about the neuroscience of the mammalian brain, which is always seeking acceptance, connection, care. If those needs are not met, we have a difficult time using our pre-frontal cortex, the so-called human brain for logic, reasoning, and planning for things like safer-sex strategies. This all comes back to the human need for touch, physical connection, and sex — the longer we go without social connection, the more difficult it is to be “human.” We are all feeling some form of social-distancing fatigue.

All this makes it even more of a challenge being single right now, especially for people living alone. For those who suffer depression or have challenges with addiction, following the rules is more challenging and stigma and preaching abstinence simply does more harm than good.

We conclude with a discussion about the need for compassionate and empathetic advocacy, as well as practicing more empathy for all of us. COVID-19 is the straw that has broken the camel’s back; it is a tipping point for humanity to realize that it’s not just a global health pandemic, rather, this is a life-changing, world-altering, system-disruption that is forcing us to evaluate civil liberties, human rights, and greater respect for the planet.

Links to Articles Mentioned on the Show

• HIV/AIDS in Contrast with the COVID-19 Pandemic — Lessons in History
• The Prejudice of PrEP: You’re Fucked if You Don’t Bareback — LOP093
• Why Gay Shame Is Your Superpower
• Humanity’s Tipping Point — Without a Return to Compassion, We’re Finished
• GGN EMPOWERMENT: Pandemic Shaming — Sex In COVID Times
• GGN EMPOWERMENT: Sex + PnP In Pandemic Times
• COVID Conversations with Shaun Proulx
• fagdemic on Twitter & Instagram

About Darren Stehle & Think Queerly

Darren is a personal leadership coach living in Toronto, Canada who helps his clients to connect and embrace their uniqueness and freely create the life they want. He writes and podcasts regularly about Queer Leadership and how we can create a more loving and accepting world for all people. Find out more at DarrenStehle.com and download his book, Think Queerly: Meditations & Critical Reflections On Liberating Humanity.

The post GGN Radio :: Sex Shaming During COVID-19  – Think Queerly Podcast appeared first on TheGayGuideNetwork.com.

Covid-19; New HIV treatments; Single and Starting PrEP?

GGN had some burning questions and took them to the long-time trusted pharmacist in the heart of Toronto’s Village, Zahid Somani, who just opened his second Village Pharmacy location serving Toronto’s LGBTQ+ community.

GGN: There’s so much pandemic talk out there – give us the real deal about COVID19 and HIV. Are HIV-positive people more at risk?

Zahid Somani: This is absolutely a question that’s top of mind for everyone. If you’re HIV-positive and on effective treatment, you are not at any greater risk than anyone else for COVID19, according to The World Health Organization, the CDC (US Centers for Disease Control), UNAIDS, and Canada’s own CATIE, to name a few. It’s still vitally important that you take your meds regularly, have good hygiene (wash your hands often / don’t touch your face), practice physical distancing, and contact your doctor or pharmacist if you have questions about your meds, or think you might have COVID19. 

For people whose CD4 count is on the low side or who are not on treatment for HIV for any reason, and for those over the age of 60 for whom there may also be underlying health issues (like heart disease, diabetes, etc), there is a greater risk for serious illness from COVID19 infection. If any of these scenarios apply to you, please start/resume HIV treatment right away. I’d also say it’s a good idea to take extra precautions – stay at home and arrange deliveries for food and meds. And, if you feel unwell, contact your doctor as soon as possible.

GGN: What’s new with HIV treatment – it feels like there’s always something. 

Somani: The amazing thing about HIV treatment is that it’s always evolving. There’s so much research going on around the world, and exciting new developments that are helping people live long and healthy lives. We’ve come a long way from the days of AZT & HIV cocktails, and in a relatively short amount of time too. 

There’s a couple of things that are exciting about the latest HIV treatments: 

The first is ‘Dual Drug Therapy,’ that is, 2-in-one single-tablet treatments that maintain viral suppression and overall good health, with lower cost and fewer side-effects. I’ve found that my clients appreciate that the single-pill regimens are convenient and well-tolerated, which makes taking meds regularly that much easier.

Dovato is the latest single-tablet regimen available for the treatment of HIV and is now covered by the Ontario Drug Benefit program (ODB) as well as most insurance companies. Dovato is approved for those who are newly diagnosed with HIV and just starting anti-retroviral therapy, or for those with high viral loads. Trials are currently underway to assess the effectiveness of Dovato when switching from more complicated regimens. Initial results are promising.  

Juluca is also a new 2-in-one that is approved for use in Canada, and it is covered by ODB. Doctors prescribe Juluca as maintenance therapy, that is, once the virus has been suppressed for some time, and is a good option to consider if you want to simplify your drug regimen. 

Injectables are another new development in HIV treatment. Cabenuva is the first long-acting HIV injection to be approved in Canada and the first anywhere in the world. The drug, by Glaxo-Smith Kline, is administered once a month. It’s still early days, and details are limited right now about costs and insurance coverage, but we’re certainly keeping tabs on how this will roll out as a treatment option in Ontario.

GGN: It’s amazing how many MSM are unaware of what “undetectable” means. The U=U campaign is helping with education around that.

Somani: Yes! U=U stands for Undetectable = Untransmissible, and that is absolutely true. Based on much research around the world, U=U means that if HIV is suppressed in your body, and your viral load is undetectable on a blood test, you cannot transmit HIV to a sexual partner, period. The Government of Canada has officially endorsed U=U and provides guidance to medical professionals.

GGN: A 40+ friend who is HIV-negative is just coming out of a long-term monogamous relationship. Is PrEP right for someone like them?

Somani: Over 40% of new HIV infections in Canada are among those over 40. That’s sobering. Thinking about PrEP means you’re taking control of your health. And, at the same time, you’re helping to reduce the spread of HIV in the community. No matter your age, if you have multiple sexual partners and want peace-of-mind protection from HIV infection, PrEP is an option that provides 95%+ protection against HIV infection when taken as directed. 

PrEP is just one pill once a day and is generally very well-tolerated. Both generic Truvada and the newer Descovy are used for PrEP and are equally effective. However, Truvada is much cheaper and is covered by insurance plans and the Ontario Drug Benefit program.

GGN: You’ve been on Church Street in Toronto for a long time and now you’ve just opened up a second location on Yonge Street. What drove that decision?

Somani: You’re right! I’ve been around since the early days of HIV, and I’ve seen both HIV treatment and the Village evolve during that time. The Church Street location will always be our hub. Unfortunately, the HIV-infection rate in Toronto and across Ontario continues to go up each year, so the need to reach more people with front-line HIV expertise remains higher than ever.  

The 535 Yonge Street location has given us extra space to offer more in-depth HIV services including HIV-testing, HIV medication consultations for both existing and New-to-HIV clients, and PrEP consultations in a safe, welcoming and confidential space. Providing access to care is something we’ve worked hard on, and will continue to do moving forward. This means helping with insurance and trillium applications, co-pay support, connecting them to doctors/clinics, HIV-services and mental health organizations and more. 

I’m so blessed to have great staff who are friendly and knowledgeable in HIV, understand the importance of confidentiality, and have a good, solid, no-nonsense work ethic. They’ve been amazing, especially during this crisis. 

Both our locations are open regular hours and provide phone/text consultations and free-delivery as always. Clients can also find info about our services on our website, along with COVID19 updates, and a trove of HIV & PrEP resources plus my HIV blog.

GGN: Final thoughts? 

Somani: Just a couple: In these crazy pandemic times, for those of you who are HIV-positive or think you might be positive, getting on and staying on HIV treatment is the number one thing you can do for your health. And for everyone, physical distancing, washing your hands, not touching your face, and getting in touch with your doctor as soon as you’re feeling unwell, can go a long way to staying healthy at this time.

The Village Pharmacy is here for you. Please reach out if you have questions about HIV, PrEP or COVID19. 

The post HIV/AIDS :: Covid and HIV; New HIV Treatments – A Q&A With Zahid Somani appeared first on TheGayGuideNetwork.com.

Hard to believe and sad to know, but here we are, 2020, and half of our “nice” fellow Canadians – according to surveys done by the Toronto HIV Hospital and hospice Casey House – would be nervous to come in contact with someone with HIV.

Further, 50% of Canadians would not eat food an HIV-positive person touched or was near; many also incorrectly believe HIV can be transmitted through skin-to-skin touch, saliva, or by sharing glasses or cutlery.

Not nice.

Is Ronald Regan still US President? In an effort to #smashstigma stemming from misinformation and fear that makes it feel like we’re stuck in the 1980s (when Regan himself took 8 years to publicly say as President the term “AIDS”,) Casey House is continuing it’s trailblazing, attention-getting work with a three-night dining event in March, June’s HIV-Positive Eatery.

Featuring a menu prepared by HIV-positive chefs, the event, named after Casey House founder, the late force of nature June Callwood, was pre-paved by an earlier pop-up edition several years ago, and then a pop-up spa a year later.

Both served to educate and hopefully eradicate some of the stigma still festering four decades later, but there remains much work to be done. (Buy tickets to June’s HIV+ Eatery here.)

In this podcast, hear from:

• Casey House CEO Joanne Simons, who takes us on a deep dive into ongoing stigma – including the online feedback to #SmashStigma initiatives – and how to not judge the judgmental
• HIV-positive chef Greg Robinson on what he learned about HIV and AIDS that he didn’t know before becoming one of the chefs for June’s HIV-positive eatery
• Social worker and host of the new Casey House podcast, Positively Speaking, Liz Creal on the journey she and her guests underwent in creating the new podcast
• Plus: a funny, irreverent flashback to last Valentine’s Day when podcast host, GGN publisher Shaun Proulx and Simons said they wanted to run over a judgemental girl with a car they were so annoyed with her.

Well that’s one way to #smashstigma.

• GGN Staff

The post GGN PODCAST :: #SmashStigma With Casey House appeared first on TheGayGuideNetwork.com.

UPDATE: As the International AIDS Conferencer 2018 winds down in Amsterdam concludes today, Realize Canada’s Tammy C. Yates and Kate Murzin share video of their powerful takeaways from The Netherlands. Scroll to the end to view.

****************

If you’re a gay man over 50 you’ve probably faced verbal rejection on dating / hookup apps. It usually goes something like this:

“So how old are you?” To which you respond with your real (or possibly your “online age”). If they’re kind they might politely decline, saying you’re handsome or good looking for your age, but they’re looking for someone younger. Worst case, you’re ghosted or the conversation moves from interested to repugnant.

Now add to the narrative above being HIV+ and you get HIV + Ageism – a discouraging mix that ostracizes and stigmatizes many adults who have lived, healthily, for the last one, two, or almost three decades, thanks to protease inhibitors and continual advances in HIV treatment that improve their lives. By the way, this is the first generation of adults, post epidemic, to actually live long enough to see old age.

#AIDSAgeism

Realize Canada is an organization that fosters positive change for people living with episodic health conditions, including HIV. Realize recently launched a new, time sensitive campaign to fight #AIDSAgeism at the International AIDS Conference in Amsterdam this July.

Realize had planned to organize an information and networking zone in the Global Village at the AIDS Conference, to discuss what it means to age with HIV, but they were turned down by the organizers.

Ageism is a persistent problem that cuts across many of the important issues of our time, and the world’s response to HIV and AIDS is no exception!

• One in four people diagnosed with HIV in Canada is 50 or older.
• In many communities (in Canada, the US and Western Europe), the majority of people living with HIV are older adults.

Despite these facts, older adults living with HIV are being overlooked in health strategies, planning and policy-making. Their unique experiences are being forgotten, and the evolving health and social uncertainties they face are barely on the radar.

To create awareness for older adults with HIV who are entering this new frontier, and being some of the first to live long enough to see old age, Realize has initiated a campaign to champion the concerns of older adults with HIV as a Human Rights issue.

Here’s how you can help!

Our “mature” cover model Shaun Proulx, GGN publisher, was recently elected to the Board of Directors of Realize, and he lends his face to the cause. Please drag the image below to your desktop, or copy it from your smart phone, and post it on your social media with a simple note such as “I support the end of #AIDSAgeism.”

Create your own image!

Take a picture of yourself and post the photo to your Facebook and Twitter accounts using the Realize campaign hashtag, #AIDSAgeism.

1. On Twitter Tag @HIVandRehab and @ShaunProulx
2. On Facebook tag @HIVandRehab and @OfficialShaunProulx
3. On Instagram tag @HIVandRehab and @ShaunProulxMediaInc

You can share the Realize campaign video on your social media accounts:

“It would be backwards, inhumane and tragic to reach a point of arrival where the first generation of people with HIV get to see old age are completely ignored, especially after 30 + years of tireless effort to get to the very place we all prayed, struggled and hoped to one day know.” ~ Shaun Proulx, GGN Publisher.

If you’re able, and would like to financially support Realize to make sure that voices of older adults living with HIV are heard, you can make a donation by clicking here.

Help fight #AIDSAgeism!

Realize Canada At The 2018 International AIDS Conference feat Tammy C Yates from Shaun Proulx Media on Vimeo.

Realize Canada At The International AIDS Conference 2018 feat Kate Murzin from Shaun Proulx Media on Vimeo.

The post #AIDSAgeism: AIDS In The Age of Growing Older (Updated) appeared first on TheGayGuideNetwork.com.

EXCLUSIVE :: GGN publisher Shaun Proulx was in New York City earlier this year to meet up with Salim “Slam” Gauwloos, best known from dancing in Madonna’s Blonde Ambition tour and Truth Or Dare, the documentary.

It is in Truth Or Dare that we saw Madonna crusade for more HIV/AIDS awareness following the death of her close friend Keith Haring of the dis-ease. This year, in the documentary Strike A Pose, which brings us up-to-date with the Blonde Ambition dancers, we learn that Gauwloos knew back then that he himself was HIV-positive. His revelation in Strike A Pose is the first time he has publicly disclosed such personal information.

Hear the intimate one-hour conversation they taped for SiriusXM’s The Shaun Proulx Show below, and learn how saying ‘yes’ to life has allowed Gauwloos to manifest love, success and happiness.

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EMPOWERMENT :: In 2001 I was working late one night at my community college as a disabilities rep for my local student union, when I heard a knock on the office door. I was a psychology major at the time.

The knock on the door was a security check, made by Ray, a male security guard I was on friendly terms with. Most evenings started with a security check, a drop in for a visit, or a chat. Ray would then carry on checking the rest of the campus.

This night felt different, a little eerie. Ray didn’t seem himself, and I was feeling tired from a really long day of studying for mid-terms, and working on a project for my student constituents.  I just wanted to get home. That didn’t happen.

I noticed a bottle in his bag. We both knew about the rules about alcohol on campus; I asked where he was going with the bottle. He said it was a confiscation but I could smell he’d been drinking.

Now I remember feeling a little scared but at the time my extreme tiredness overwhelmed that.

In the back of the office was a mattress. I went to lie down. Ray said he’d come back to check on me, and he locked the door behind him as he left.

I dozed off – for the whole night. I woke up to sheer horror. I was stripped down to nothing, the mattress was soaked with alcohol, water and semen. I was in pain, and Ray was nowhere to be found. I got myself together as best I could and ran to the emergency blue phones. I called 9-1-1, and within minutes, the police were everywhere, looking for Ray. 

They couldn’t find him right away, so they took me down to the nearby hospital. I checked in, filled out a police report as best I could, got a rape kit done, and was tested for every STD possible then sent home.

I spent the next few days in solitude, trying to figure out why something like this could happen to me, from someone I trusted, someone that I actually liked as a person, and how he could do something so violent, hurtful  and cruel.

I learned six weeks after the rape that I was HIV-positive. With two kids, ages 6 and 11, I was now an HIV-positive mom. 

In 2003 I received my psychology degree. In the time leading up to that accomplishment, I decided that if this was the hand I was dealt, I had to make the rest of my life as good as I knew how. I learned from this traumatic experience that it is up to me to own my life, to live deliberately.

The improvements I made to honour myself remain part of my life now. I eat as healthy as possible. I get myself out every day for a walk. I make time to pursue my passion for photography, performance, and theatre. Self care is important to me because if I won’t treat myself well, no one else will do that for me. Every day when I wake up and am still here, my heart beating, it is the beginning of a new day where I won’t let anything get in the way of good living.

When life becomes challenging I refuse to give up on myself, and I believe angels (I have a lot hanging out in this city) all help me get me through this journey called life.

Ray was booked, charged and ended up losing his job. I was given an opportunity to re-think the kind of life I wanted to have and to make it so.

–  Annabelle Harris is a pseudonym.

The post EMPOWERMENT :: What I Learned From Being Raped And Acquiring HIV appeared first on TheGayGuideNetwork.com.

“God Shaun, we suck.”

A friend in West Hollywood in LA’s entertainment industry was first to tell me about rumoured whisperings that Charlie Sheen was HIV-positive.

This was around two summers ago, after she learned I had publicly disclosed on CBC that in 2005 I was diagnosed HIV-positive.

“Well played,” she texted, once my news trickled down her way. “I hear Charlie Sheen is HIV.”

There was no judgement of Charlie Sheen as our our chin-wag unfolded, but there was lots towards a society still holding 1980’s attitudes and beliefs powerful enough, if rumours were true, that even Charlie Sheen – aka Mr. #Winning, Mr. Tiger Blood, Mr. On Tour, Mr. Didn’t Care What Anyone Thought – apparently felt bound to secrecy, about this, of all the things.

Charlie Sheen disclosed his HIV status, Tuesday on The Today Show, and confirmed he was afraid.

Afraid to the tune of reportedly millions of dollars paid, hush money for people he says he trusted.

What other dis-ease is there where people could blackmail someone over it?

Shame on our society.

We suck. My So-Cal gal pal was right.

Here is what else Charlie Sheen’s HIV disclosure tells us all:

WE MUST STOP LIVING IN THE PAST:

No one wants to become ill with any dis-ease, but where HIV stands we have still, as individuals and collectively, a massive, tight, knot of old negative energy within. It feels unique to HIV; Charlie Sheen shares in his open letter that his diagnosis was a “mule kick” to the soul.

It was such a soul kick, Charlie Sheen then sadly acknowledges further in his public missive, that: “I might have been trying to kill myself” via “profound substance abuse and fathomless drinking.”

Kill himself? Why? Who wants to kill themselves (though Sheen isn’t alone) upon hearing they have a manageable dis-ease? Why, in a time that we all fought so hard to reach – when one can take one pill a day to stay healthy as an HIV-negative person, or a pill a day to stay healthy as an HIV-positive person – are we not celebrating this, rather than reacting like our late brothers and sisters had no choice but to, mired as they were in the death sentence misery of decades past?

Our thinking has not caught up with the world in which we live.  We owe it to ourselves and to those long gone who would love to still be among us to guide our individual thoughts to match what is the true nature of HIV today; we must keep up with the miraculous progress that has been made.

WE NEED A NEW GAME THAN SHAME:

Charlie Sheen didn’t tell Today Show host Matt Lauer, “I am here to ‘disclose’ or ‘acknowledge’ or ‘state’ or ‘reveal’ or ‘ share’ that I am HIV-positive.” Instead, he said, “I am here to admit that I am in fact HIV-positive”.

Or, as one media outlet put it: Charlie Sheen gave “a shocking confession.”

Like you do with a priest? Or cops? ‘Admit’ and ‘confession’ are both words more appropriately used to describe someone who has done something wrong, like a criminal or immoral act.

Charlie Sheen did no wrong except be human, and have happen to him what can happen to any human being who engages in the human act we call sex – only the most powerful force of nature going.

Does the person who acquires lung cancer after years of smoking – even though we all know smoking can kill us – “admit” they have lung cancer? “Confess” it? How many lung cancer patients are victims of blackmail because their lung cancer is so “shameful”, or because revealing their lung cancer could destroy their career, or because the smoking of the cigarettes that caused the lung cancer might have caused others who inhaled their second hand smoke to develop lung cancer, too?

Angelina Jolie was able to share her double mastectomy news like a gift, to help people in situations like she faced. Same with Rosie O’Donnell, sharing of the heart attack she had that she didn’t know she had.

But Charlie Sheen? Because of ancient Regan-era stigma that abounds about this particular dis-ease, he likely couldn’t think, “Will this help others?” Instead, he had to disclose to put an end to the brutalization of his finances as his intention, to get ahead of a tabloid cover story.

WE NEED TO LEARN OUR WORDS:

I used to think Raven Symone was vaguely cool (her name is Raven after all), until she joined The View and now I just feel sorry for ravens.

“There’s also different ways to get AIDS, it’s not just through sex, it’s a lot of different ways,” Symone zinged recently while interviewing a former child star who is HIV-positive, even though she had no reason to use the words AIDS in that context, just as the tabloid about should not have used the word AIDS about Charlie Sheen, who is undetectable.

Here is a great myths vs facts piece.

Unaware of the difference between AIDS, HIV and ‘undetectable’, Symone and her ignorance (despite being of the age in which education was aplenty), took me back to July of this year, when thousands sent me hate in response to a misunderstood post about Caitlyn Jenner.

The first piece of hate I read was in the form a tweet, that hoped I would “suck AIDS dick and die.”

Friends, when tabloids to talk show hosts to tweeters can’t send a guy a simple death wish, or interview an HIV-positive former child star, or put out a cover story without using the wrong health term we sadly still have a lot of education to do. (And what in hell is “AIDS dick”?).

WE MUST MAKE SEX SEXY AGAIN:

I almost don’t want to write this part because it’s so damned boring, the notion that sex is bad, wrong, sick, heinous, sending us all to hell blah blah blah.

In an interview I did years ago with Reverend Troy Perry, founder of the Metropolitan Community Church, Perry put it best:

“We get this notion that because we’re sexual beings, somehow we’re not good enough, or we should be guilty about the feelings we have, that are natural feelings, that are created from God.”

So can we move past this one? We owe it to ourselves – and future generations will benefit mightily if we can pull this off – to ask this: “Which habit of thought do I wish to choose: the one that honours who I am sexually, or the one in which I continue to berate one of the most powerful expressions of that which I am?”

WE MUST STOP BEING HYPOCRITES:

We are hypocrites, because we have sex, love it, but then feel guilty after (bad, wrong, sick, heinous, blah blah blah hell blah).

So then we wag our fingers at each other, we slut shame, we sniff our noses at the notion of “promiscuity”. We do this even though no one person I know of has ever had protected sex 100% of the time, no one I know has lead a life void of a sexual bender or blunder, and not one person I know doesn’t love and enjoy sex.

I love my sex life. I love that I have had sex with vast numbers of men, and I am proud of it. Sheen, myself, anyone who acquired or acquires HIV in the manner he and I seem to have both acquired it, did so only because we are human beings who had human experiences – the end.

In in the shaming of anyone, we only loudly proclaim how very ashamed we are of ourselves.

HIV DOESN’T DISCRIMINATE

Yes, that’s been oft-said, but until now, in this red-hot week, has there ever been a more globally-known straight white man to share that he acquired the HIV virus?  Now, finally, the world has proof positive that HIV and AIDS is colour blind, gender blind, and blind to sexual orientation, fame, money, or celebrity. Charlie Sheen’s diagnosis tells us all this, trumpeting more loudly than ever before: HIV does not discriminate.

 RELATED READING :: HIV DIVORCE

 – Shaun Proulx is the publisher of GGN. He shares himself on social media almost as much as he does in the boudoir, and he does it proudly: Instagram. Twitter. Twitter for The Shaun Proulx Show on SiriusXM. Facebook.

The post CHARLIE SHEEN :: What His HIV Disclosure Tells Us All appeared first on TheGayGuideNetwork.com.

LOOK WHAT YOU DID :: Update October 6 – The campaign first described below when Toronto kicked off Pride Week 2015 achieved its donation goal, resulting in 21 Million Miles donated to Aeroplan’s Beyond Miles charity program. The Aeroplan Miles have been equally split three ways (7 million miles each) and donated to Egale, Rainbow Railroad and The Stephen Lewis Foundation – to put this into perspective, 21 million miles would translate to approximately 105 return flights to Africa or 650 hotel night stays in downtown Toronto. Congratulations to all who participated!

*****

#ForeverProud: Make a Difference this Pride with TD and Aeroplan

Happy Pride week! As part of an ongoing commitment to the LGBT community, TD Bank is excited to be in its 11^th year supporting Toronto’s Pride week. TD is Pride’s only Platinum sponsor, and this year its #ForeverProud campaign will also be supporting three local causes.

For every dollar that is spent using a TD Aeroplan Credit Card anywhere in Toronto during Pride week, TD and Aeroplan will donate one Aeroplan Mile to Aeroplan’s national charitable program, Beyond Miles. The Aeroplan Miles will be equally divided and donated between three local organizations: Egale, The Stephen Lewis Foundation and Rainbow Railroad. This means every time you use your TD Aeroplan Credit Card during Pride week in Toronto, you are directly supporting and making a difference to an important cause. This could range from helping to fund a flight for an LGBT refugee, to helping provide care to an orphaned child living with HIV and AIDS, simply by using your TD Aeroplan Credit Card.

In addition to the Beyond Miles initiative, TD will also be supporting 2015 Pride in the following ways:

• Pride Parade: Dozens of TD employees will be participating in the annual Pride Parade on Sunday, June 28^th
• TD “VIP Lounge” at Green Space Treehouse Party: A relaxing and tranquil oasis for Pride-goers to refresh, recharge and revitalize (exclusively for TD Aeroplan Visa Infinite Privilege cardholders)
• TD-Sponsored Bike Share Toronto: All bikes will have their spokes decorated in the Pride rainbow
• TD Flight Crew Photo Experience: Come out to play and pose with a photo with the TD flight crews aboard Rainbow Class
• Monster Mural: As part of the TD Fun Zone, children and their families are invited to help paint a giant mural in Toronto’s gay village

TD supports hundreds of LGBT organizations throughout the year including sponsoring over 50 Pride festivals across Canada and the US. Be sure to check out all of TD’s Pride week activities!

– Sponsored post.

The post UPDATE #ForeverProud: Make a Difference this Pride with TD and Aeroplan appeared first on TheGayGuideNetwork.com.

SHIFTING GEARS :: The Friends For Life Bike Rally is a 600-kilometre bike ride from Toronto to Montréal in support of the Toronto People With AIDS Foundation (PWA). Now in its 17^th year, the Bike Rally is the sustaining fundraiser for PWA and has become the largest AIDS fundraiser of its kind in Canada. Long-time rider Alan Hooey joined GGN publisher Shaun Proulx in conversation about their experiences participating in the ride – and how it reflects the changing face of HIV.

SP: Bravo to all riders and crew: a 6-day, 600 kilometer journey from Toronto to Montreal – on damn bikes! I’ve done the ride three times, but you Alan Hooey have done it eight times. Screw you, Mister, being so much better than me. You are about to take off on your ninth ride – why?

AH: It starts out as a personal challenge, to see if you can train yourself up to six days on a bike. But throughout the week you learn, you experience, and you grow. So the community, and the benefiting organization, PWA, become so important in your life that you just continue to do it.

SP: A massive commitment.

AH: It’s a lot of work, but it starts out early in the year; we have training rides every weekend. I take my inspiration from the first year riders. When I see a first year rider on their bike with a smile on their face, it makes me work harder, it makes me go faster. The ride itself is amazing! It’s spending time alone on your bike for six days. The camping is the great part about it.

SP: I remember the ride being difficult, but wonderful because it was so meditative.  You have this stretch of road in front of you, you’re by yourself, and you’ve got stillness around you. I won’t forget the first time I realized: I’m not thinking about work. I’m not thinking about my commitments. I’m not thinking about anything. So it’s a very healthy thing.

AH:  It’s very healthy. There’s no place I find more comforting than on my bike. But this also gives me a chance to engage with my community, it gives me a chance to share with people.

SP: There is a “lean on, a rely on”: 96 crew and 234 riders. Those 96 crew, they are making you breakfast, they are making you lunch, they’re making you dinner, they’re taking all your camping gear, and driving it to the next stop. They are responsible for the good care and treatment of a small, moving village.

AH: The crew work phenomenally hard all week, they carry our bins from one spot to another.  Food crew gets up at probably 3 o’clock in the morning, starts preparing breakfast for all the participants. We have a complete wellness compliment that comes with us, so we’ve got people massaging us, and acupuncture, and chiropractic students are all along the ride with us. We are so supported that you can’t help but smile at the end of the day. There’s so much on the line there.

SP: Not to mention the road support. If you are reading this and haven’t experienced this ride, imagine yourself driving through corn fields, and you turn and all of a sudden, drag queens or crazy costumed volunteers are jumping out of the corn fields, cheering you on and telling you your next turn!

AH: They are, and they’re directing you the right way! 

SP: What is the worst thing that’s ever happened to you on the bike ride?

AH: It was all bike related. One year, I’ve had a few flats. In one day, I had four flats and two broken spokes the exact same day. But thankfully, we have a whole mechanic  crew that come with us. They fixed me up, and I was good to go the next day.

SP: Do you want to hear a story?

AH: Sure.

SP: I’ve never told this story before. So I get a flat, which is my idea of a horror story, worst nightmare, because I don’t know how to fix a flat and don’t want to know how. But now I’m middle of nowhere, alone. The Bike Rally, they make you carry a repair kit so that you can take care of yourself, so you have to have the tools, and I did. But it’s not like I know how to use it – though I am supposed to. But I don’t! I’m not the man you teach to fish! So finally, the road crew is coming along in their van, which I knew would happen, and I know they will pull over to say, are you okay?

I thought, If they see that I have the tools to fix my tire, I’m going to be expected to fix my tire. So I take my repair kit and I throw it over my shoulder into the bush! They pulled over, asked if I was okay and I was like, flashing a little leg, all, “Hey Sailor” and I say, “Golly, I don’t know where my wrench, is, or my tube or anything, and I don’t know what to do, kind Sirs.”  So they’re like hop in, and I do and we drove the last couple miles to the camp and someone fixed it for me. I totally cheated.

AH: I’m going to have to use that story.

SP: All yours. Tell us about, I guess it’s the Thursday night of the ride when everybody has a big damn cry.

AH: Seventeen years ago a few friends got together and decided to ride to Montreal to raise money for PWA, that was in desperate need for support. They ended up one night just telling stories about their friends and loved ones, around the campfire, and that grew and grew. It grew from a vigil into a ceremony, then a candlelight vigil. But, now that so many years have gone by, we decided that we needed to start actually celebrating lives of people that are living, as well as people that have passed. We’re really about celebrating now. People are living longer, people are living stronger. This year is all about celebrating. We’re taking the whole week, and we’re turning it into a story starting on departure day. We’re going to be going to be celebrating the lives of people around us.

SP: Now that is what I mean when I talk about a thought revolution! We’ve come so far with HIV. I said this last World AIDS Day in a post called HIV Divorce: here in Canada, where we are so blessed, and we’ve come so far, we have to show people what the closest thing to what we have ever seen that looks like a finish line looks like. What leadership looks like, what the light at the end of the tunnel looks like, and it is the shift that the Rally is making this year this way that does that. I am so happy that we’re not talking exclusively about what’s wrong anymore, and that we’re focusing on accomplishments – what you focus on expands.

AH: We’re getting rid of stigma, stigma is getting cast aside, it’s not going to be there anymore.

SP: That is some amazing change-making!  I love this so much. This is great, great leadership. We wish you, Alan, and everyone participating in this year’s ride a great one, and thank you to each of you.

To donate, go to www.bikerally.org

This interview was condensed and edited.

The post HIV :: Friends For Life Bike Rally Switches Gears appeared first on TheGayGuideNetwork.com.

Dreaming Bigger One Kilometre at a Time :: If you’ve never participated in – or heard of – The Toronto People With AIDS Foundation’s Friends For Life Bike Rally before, you’re missing out on knowing an incredible life-changing experience.

The Bike Rally is a 600-kilometre bike ride from Toronto to Montréal in support of the Toronto People With AIDS Foundation (PWA). Now in its 17^th year, the Bike Rally is the sustaining fundraiser for PWA and has become the largest AIDS fundraiser of its kind in Canada.

The nearly 400 Riders and Crew of all ages and levels of experience who participate in the Bike Rally share a common passion in supporting their friends, family and neighbours living with HIV/AIDS. Since its inception, the Bike Rally has raised over $13 million for PWA, with a goal this year to raise another $1.4 million.

While fundraising for a vitally important organization like PWA and riding a bike for 600 kilometres instills a sense of accomplishment in itself, experiencing the Bike Rally gives so much more back to Participants. It gives them a chance to celebrate friendships, strengthen a community and create memories – all the while allowing participants to dream bigger, one kilometre at a time.

Riders and Crew join the Bike Rally for many different reasons: to experience a journey with a lifetime friend or to make new friends for life, to support a loved one living with HIV/AIDS, to meet a new personal challenge, or simply to participate in an adventure to create memories for a lifetime. Whatever their reason, at the end of the journey is a great sense of belonging, accomplishment, and community that comes with supporting a local organization that personally and immediately impacts the lives of members of their own communities living with HIV/AIDS.

PWA provides critical programs and services for people living with and affected by HIV/AIDS.  In addition to practical supports such as food and financial assistance, PWA provides opportunities to connect with others, learn new skills, and gain access to resources to achieving goals and dreams.  The Bike Rally is an amazing example of how PWA strives to engage Participants in its mission. All Participants are encouraged to dream bigger through their Bike Rally experience. By riding their bike or assisting on one of the many support crews, Participants know they’re helping an organization provide programs and services needed by so many today. Moreover, through their actions they help to fulfil the dream of eliminating the stigma associated with HIV/AIDS that continues to exist.

If you’re looking to get more involved and leave a tangible mark on your community, create life-lasting memories and great friendships, the Friends For Life Bike Rally is for you. Join us and together we can dream bigger…one kilometre at a time.

To find out more, or to make a donation to the Toronto People with AIDS Foundation, go to Bikerally.org.

GGN Staff

The post HIV :: The Friends For Life Bike Rally Rides On – For A 17th Time appeared first on TheGayGuideNetwork.com.

MUSIC :: Legendary superstar Melissa Etheridge‘s warm, heartfelt and personal new album, This is ME, is out now. GGN publisher Shaun Proulx spoke to the icon about her new music, the nature of risk, and how she points back to the cancer experience she had a decade ago as reason why she began seeing the world in a completely different light.

SP: How are you?

Melissa Etheridge: I’m doing good, so happy to be talking to you.

SP: As you get older do you find you’re willing to expose a little bit more of ME, as you would say?

Melissa Etheridge: I think as I’m getting older I’m realizing that indeed, this life is a journey. That you don’t ever get somewhere, and go, “Hey, I got here!”, and that’s it. It’s always unfolding and becoming, that I try to bring that into my music, I try to explain. Everyone’s here, absolutely to do what they do, but if my music inspires you in any way, let me share it with you.

SP: In the lyrics to A Little Bit of Me you’re saying: “we’re all one, and the world goes round and round” – that we’re all affecting each other, and I’ve got tell you, that’s a theme that I’m understanding now, at 46 more than ever. We are all connected, which kind of sounds like a telecommunications ad, I know. But we are. None of us are separate entities, none of us.

Melissa Etheridge: Yes, you can call it wisdom, or you can call it an awakening that is happening all over the world, and has been slowly happening for the last decades. There’s a sense of, “Wait a minute, there’s a little bit more going on here, that we’ve all got it. We’re all very diverse in how we’re handling this life, and we’re doing what our purpose is, and what our religion is, or our spirit, what we believe in. We’re all different, yet you can find this oneness, this commonality in everything. We’ve searched the whole world now, and there’s a commonness that kind of, if you really take it in, if you really think about it, there really is a oneness that I don’t ever have to be afraid or say, “that stranger might want to hurt me”. That’s also in myself too, it’s this very subtle line.

SP: I’m finding it’s harder for me to dislike people.

Melissa Etheridge: Yes! We have more empathy, don’t we?

SP: There are still people, don’t get me wrong, I pick my battles a little bit more. Empathy rises up faster in me. There’s a big scandal going on in Canada right now, over one of our beloved broadcasters who is accused of some terrible things, and I’m having a hard time not feeling bad for him, despite the things he’s been accused of doing. I’m having a hard time. I’m kind of worried for him, and I think that’s what you represent really beautifully in your music, and the output that you do.  I told you this before off the air, you said something to me the last time we spoke, and I wrote it down. It’s being living in my office ever since, do you remember your own smart words Melissa Etheridge?

Melissa Etheridge: Oh boy!

SP: “The strongest, most powerful thing you can do in your country, in your town, on your street, in your family, is to love yourself. It’s to come to a place inside yourself, knowing that your creator made you perfect, you’re the way you’re supposed to be, and if you can hold on to that, and vibrate with that, you affect your family, your town, your country.” I get chills!

Melissa Etheridge: You’re so sweet! Sometimes, and this will start happening to you, your words will come back to you just when you need them.

SP: Really?

Melissa Etheridge: Write that down, because I really needed to hear that – for myself – today. Thank you!

SP: When you began your career in ’88, if you had any idea this would be part of the trajectory you’re on?

Melissa Etheridge: Oh no, I just wanted to be rich and famous. I thought that was a destination, but alas, it is not. It’s not even a desire.

SP: Tell us, in this fame-obsessed world, as one of the more famous women in the world, what your feelings about fame are.

Melissa Etheridge: Fame is a crazy thing. Fame is a very, very potent flame!  It’s a fire that consumes you, and can just turn you into ashes if you don’t know what’s going on. It’s a energy that comes off of a whole lot of people, and it’s everyone thinking one thing at the same time, and you can feel it energetically. I have ridden different waves of fame, and have learned, “Ok, that’s a part of me, and it’s all good, and there’s certainly a lot of benefits that come from it, and there’s a lot of negative stuff that come from it, and it just is. So fame is a part of my life, and  in this day and age, there’s nothing you can hide.

SP: What are your thoughts and beliefs about the idea of taking risks, especially in the career you’re in.

Melissa Etheridge: It has to do with how you interpret risk. Risk is an emotion, risk is a judgment on something. Last year I made a huge choice to change my management, I changed all my people, and I felt it could be risky. I also got off my record label. I made a big leap that could have been risky, yet I took a risk.

SP: Were there fears leaving your management, leaving your people, changing things up? Those are tangible things. They are people with feelings, so you say it in an easy way, but there must have been anxiety or fear.

Melissa Etheridge: I had to walk into my manager’s office, and he’s been my manager for 30 years.

SP: Ugh!

Melissa Etheridge: Believe me, for days, I needed to breathe, I had to meditate on it: I’m going to go in, I mean no harm, I’m coming from love about all of this, there’s no bad. I just walked in, and it came from love, and it was a beautiful experience, and he said thank you, and it was great.

SP: Have you always been someone who would meditate on it? Think about your intention? Walk in on management with love…were you always like that?

Melissa Etheridge: No, this started about ten years ago. I come from the mid-west. In Kansas I feel we’re in common with Canadians actually. There’s a politeness, you’re nice to people, you work hard, and you take care of your family and people around you. That’s just what we’ve grown up with, we’re raised with, so sometimes, if you take that too far, if you begin to take care of people’s feelings and you think you are going to make them feel a certain way, and you believe you have that power to do that, you can limit yourself – and I was doing that a lot. I was getting very far, yet limiting in my personal relationships, in my business relationships, myself on stage. It’s been such a journey, and ten years ago I was diagnosed with cancer, and I was just, Woah! Wait a minute! This is not the way the movie ends! What is this? I really took that as a wake-up call to find my power, find my strength, my life-force. That’s what keeps us moving through this life. I’m at age now, I see people passing away, and I understand it’s a force, it’s a life-force, and I intend to be around for a long time.

SP: Do you think the cancer was the sum of all the parts you saw before that, of not necessarily being your full self, not necessarily honouring yourself, not necessarily looking after yourself first? Do you think that those things dove-tail together?

Melissa Etheridge: I do, and I get in a lot of trouble sometimes when I talk about that, because people have a hard time hearing that maybe we have a responsibility in our health. We have a responsibility to ourselves, that what we think about ourselves, the emotions we feel inside, in the food we take in, absolutely dictates what our self is, that’s what my deep belief is. I come across some people who get very upset about that. There’s a certain comfort in thinking that disease just happens to you, and that you can get sick because of a gene, or something. I struggle with that.

SP:  I was diagnosed HIV-positive in 2005, and for the last 10 years, almost, I’ve never been sick. I live a very productive, healthy life, and it’s in agreement with you, that I say this, it’s because of the way I think about it, the way I treat it, the way I treat myself, the gentle way in which I handle my life, and myself, the food I eat, the thoughts I think, the meditating I do, and none of it out of desperation or anything. I was always at peace with the diagnosis – I think that my first correct step, being at peace with it was one of the things that taught me to be responsible for this diagnosis that I had been given – so that all it ever was, was a diagnosis, and it wasn’t Shaun. I hear you.  Before we stop, I just want to say this: I think that you carry a light that’s bigger than your music, and I’m feeling it right now, just talking to you for the second time. I think you’re just a wonderful person, and I want to say thank you.

Melissa Etheridge: Shaun, I think I’m going to call you, whenever I need a lifting up, because this is perfect! I was like, what is my life about, and you’re just how the universe can be! It can just give you what you need, right there. Life is happening for us, not to us. I love you, Shaun.

SP: I love you too.

The post MELISSA ETHERIDGE :: A Light Bigger Than Music appeared first on TheGayGuideNetwork.com.

Shaun Proulx: Your Love Fades Away is your new single, available now on iTunes.

Simone Denny: Yeah!

SP: You’ve got a full-length album coming out, The Stereo Dynamite Sessions.

SD: Yes, Volume 1.

SP: Volume 1 – will there be Dynamite Sessions volume 2?

SD: Two, three, four, we’ll keep it going!

SP: When is that out? Do we know yet? I know it’s fall.

SD: Yeah! It actually will be out on November 4^th on my birthday!

SP: Scorpio!

SD: Yes!

SP: Remember I  just guessed that when we were together last?

SD: But I’m a nice Scorpio!

SP: Not so sure, if I can just guess! But before that, on September 13^th, we’re going to knock it out of the park, having you on stage after the Walk. What’s it like to be re-visiting old music, like Broken Bones?

SD: I get requests to sing Love, Inc. all the time. I love singing it, I love seeing people react, and dance. It takes them back to a good place in their lives, and I enjoy it.

SP: Let’s talk a bit about the cause, because you come from an industry, and you come from an audience – and while your audience isn’t predominantly gay and HIV/AIDS isn’t a gay dis-ease exclusively – still you must have seen, heard, experienced, and watched. How has HIV played a role in your life experience?

SD: Well, I love people, and I’ve met a lot of people in my life, especially in the industry I am in. So therefore I’ve  come in contact with people who are living with HIV/AIDS. It affects me because these are people who that are talented, they’re beautiful people, and I would like to see them live, and enjoy their life. Thank God there are cocktails out there that they can take, so they can maintain a healthy lifestyle. But I would love to see this dis-ease completely disappear in our lifetime, and I think that we will get there very soon. But, in the meantime, I’m there to sing my heart out, and do what I can to support people.

SP: I wish that your open heart was the way everybody felt HIV/AIDS.  I came out a year ago, as an HIV-positive person.

SD: I remember.

SP: The reason why I thank you for your open-heartedness is what I came to realize from the doing of that, is that it’s stigma, that is the real toxicity of this dis-ease, at least here in North America where we have drugs most of us are lucky enough to access.  It was a stunning experience to feel some of the stigma that is still out there, and experience it myself when I came out, so thank you for your non-judgmental open-heartedness.

SD: I think education is the key. The more you know about it, the more you understand it. I inter-mix with people who have it, and who are dealing with it, and it’s just like everybody else. Everybody has something they are going through. For me, I went through cancer, and I survived it, and a lot of people didn’t know that. I kept it very quiet to myself for awhile, so I understand exactly how something like that can affect your life, your psyche. I know how difficult it is to even share this sort of information with someone, so my heart, as you said, is very open, and I just love people, and I’m here to help, in any way that I can.

SP: I didn’t know that you’ve been through a cancer battle, so thank you for sharing.

SD: Nobody did.

SP: Is that why, when you were on my show last time, and I said, “Where have you been this last little while?” you said, “Oh, you know, I’ve been busy with stuff.” It wasn’t a full and complete answer, and I felt like…

SD: There was more there.

SP: I’m a bad radio-host that way, because I know you, and you’re my friend, so I decided not to go there, even though obviously there’s somewhere to go.  Because I wouldn’t want to do that to someone I know. You didn’t want to tell anyone about your health status – why?

SD: I didn’t tell relatives. I told my immediate family, I told my mom, my dad, my sister knew, and maybe about two or three close friends knew. It was just a situation where I needed to take time to gather my strength, to see what was before me, and focus in on me, and lock everyone else out. I find that when you start to tell people, everyone figures out why you got it, how you got it, what the cure is, what you need to do, and I find that sometimes, maybe people mean well, but it can be very negative, and it can shift your focus a lot. I just needed time to focus on me. I dealt with colon cancer, I was very blessed to get through it, and I’m still standing, and I’m here.

SP: I’m glad to hear that you’re well. When I was diagnosed myself, my attitude was very much the same, as what you were saying. I wasn’t ashamed, and I’m not ashamed, but I didn’t want to make the issue bigger by adding everyone else’s energy to it. I wanted the dis-ease to know that it’s place in my life was going to be very very small.

SD: And I’m all about the energy, so I get that. I understand exactly what you mean.

SP: What was the reaction though, when the rest of the world found out?

SD: You know, this is probably the first time I’ve ever talked about it to anyone, to be quite honest.

SP: I’m honoured.

SD: Thank you! You’re my friend, of course! Most of my family members were pretty shocked! “Why didn’t you tell us?!” and I’m like, “You know what? I’m good now, everything’s fine.” One family member, who had a big celebration for my grandmother’s 100^th birthday, I pulled him aside, and he was very close to me, and I didn’t want to worry him. I told him, and he almost burst into tears. And he just hugged me and hugged me, and wouldn’t let go, and it was really sweet. And I tell people, “It’s nothing against you personally, I just needed to get through it.” I thought I was going to have to do chemo, I didn’t know what was coming, and It was still a shock to me, to be quite honest, because I was like, “I have what? Stage what? What?” So it took emotionally a lot for me to catch up to what was happening.

SP: Thank you for going there. When I came out, I was on CBC radio and I talked about the idea of dis-ease and humanity. We all have aspects of our humanity we want to deal with personally and don’t want everyone’s judgment, or everyone’s idea of how to fix it, anyone’s energy, period. Whether it’s dis-ease, divorce, bankruptcy, body issues, messy families, we all have something we are dealing with – you never know what the person next to you is going through. >Tweet this! I thank you so much my friend for sharing that.

SD: My pleasure!

SP: Dis-ease and health, and the way we look at it, and the way we handle it, and the way we judge other people period, they all go hand in hand.

SD: Very much so.

SP: So now, you know what, now I’m really excited that you are going to headline at Yonge/Dundas Square.

SD: I’m really excited too, I can’t wait!

SP: I love you and I can’t wait to see you next month.

SD: I love you too, thank you so much for this conversation.

The post SIMONE DENNY :: Dynamite Resilience appeared first on TheGayGuideNetwork.com.

SURVEY SAID :: A groundbreaking study is underway that aims to demonstrate what many gay men would claim to already know: gay strengths abound in a LGBT society abundant with empowered men.

The post GAY STRENGTHS :: Empowered Men appeared first on TheGayGuideNetwork.com.

THANK YOU! :: This episode was the most talked-about program on December 1st, World AIDS Day. Due to popular demand, enjoy this special presentation of The Shaun Proulx Show throughout December. Sponsored in party by AbbVie and The Village Pharmacy (Toronto)

Says Proulx, who hosts and executive produced the show: “This isn’t  just for HIV stakeholders, this show is for anyone dealing with circumstances in their lives that result in judgement – from self or others. Anyone dealing with ageism, sexism, racism, body fascism, people with money problems, relationship problems – everyone, in other words – will relate to the conversation we’re presenting. It’s a conversation that is ultimately about taking the circumstances of your life – whatever they are – and the empowerment that comes from seeing them differently than you might have ever before.”

Please share this with others, and join the conversation on Twitter using @ShaunProulx / #ThoughtRevolution.

The post WORLD AIDS DAY 2013 :: The Shaun Proulx Show appeared first on TheGayGuideNetwork.com.

WHAT WORKS FOR ME :: Since publicly disclosing for the first time several weeks ago on the CBC that I was diagnosed HIV-positive in 2005, I find myself getting asked a multitude of questions. One of the questions I’m most asked is: “how is it that you are HIV-positive and so healthy”? This is often followed by: “You seem so robust and energetic – I would never have even thought you were sick!”

Isn’t it funny after all these years, the place we’re in on the issue of HIV? On one hand you have an often misinformed general public (to clarify: I’m not “sick”, I just tested positive for a virus, and for years since have continued to test “undetectable”; I can’t spread the virus) – and on the other hand, as I write this, my publicist, as we promote my World AIDS Day Special, is actually hearing back from some mainstream media – most people’s trusted source of information – that HIV is no longer relevant.

If people are walking around thinking that HIV = sick, such ignorance is newsworthy, methinks.

Or maybe this is: Earlier this week I had the honour of acting as MC for the Ontario AIDS Network’s annual Honour Roll reception. It was a lovely evening of heart and humour in which I shared a bit of my story. After, a woman came up to me and pulled me aside. “Thank you for being so inspiring for having come out. I’m HIV-positive and no one knows.”

If she had breast cancer, MS or any other of the multitudes of ailments one might have, bet you she wouldn’t be carrying the burden of a secret. But HIV? Still so misunderstood, and still so much stigma attached.

But I digress. The fact remains, I am not sick and I don’t get sick – aside from a couple of fairly forgotten undramatic bumps in my health along the way. Not even a cold in winter.

I attribute this to many two things. First I am blessed to live in Canada and in a modern age. I have access to  meds that keep HIV virus at bay. I also have an incredible medical doctor with whom I can discuss anything; I’ve seen him for two decades now.

The second thing I attribute my long-term solid health to is my mindset and my openness towards new ideas when it comes to general well-being. I believe it’s about four pillars: mental, emotional, spiritual and physical health. Keeping these pillars strong can cost money (but I believe I’m a good investment). Some options are not expensive, though, and others are free.

I didn’t suddenly one day begin practicing and incorporating all of this into my life, I just began to integrate what felt best to me in the moment, one thing at a time, over time, and still continue today.

• I detox every morning via oil pulling, and hot water with apple cider vinegar (or lemons, but I have a sensitivity to them) before having a coffee and food.
• I meditate and journal religiously.
• I drink a truck-load of fresh juice each week.
• I dry-skin brush before every shower at home.
• I practice hot yoga (super sweaty) at least once a week.
• I eat organic and free-range and local. This is more expensive but it tastes better and is better (I’m forever baffled by people who can’t live without the latest in phones but who want  what they put in their bodies – food and drink – priced as cheaply as possible).
• I recently had my food sensitivities tested and so had cut some surprises (eggs! tuna! lemons! cheese!) right out of my diet once I got the results.
• I use a service like FitOrganix who provide healthy meals delivered to your door. Delicious and not much more than buying and preparing it yourself.
• I take a full range of vitamins and use products like Bio-K and UltraInflamx to create optimum gut health (HIV lives in the gut).
• I drink two shots of aloe juice daily.
• I drink at least one cup of green tea every day. I’ve been addicted for over a decade to this mega-healthy tea.
• I go on cleanses a couple times a year. Watch GGN in January for some post-holiday examples, including a social media cleanse I just did.
• I get a B12 shot monthly and am regular about getting my blood work done (this wasn’t always the case). I have my testosterone levels monitored (HIV can deplete your testosterone, I have learned the very hard way, and it’s awful).
• I also see a naturopath, a chiropractor, an acupuncturist, get regular massages, and have seen colonic therapists, energy healers, psychics, a yogi and an angel reader. I carry three particular healing crystals with me. It’s about having an open mind and heart about your life experience.
• I use the hot tub, steam room and sauna every time I’m at the Y. (Insert joke here.)
• After I publicly disclosed my HIV-status I went through a lot emotionally, for several days. I didn’t feel myself at all. I was taken really aback by how awful I felt. I was very despondent and paranoid about what people thought of me. After a week of that nonsense I got myself into counselling, which helped tremendously. I realize I was carrying around a lot of issues about being HIV-positive and I’m enjoying working with a great man at ACT to deal with them. Mental health is important for all of us to take care of – HIV or not – and I have never hesitated in my adult life to see a shrink when need be.
• I stay informed about new treatment options. This year a new single table regimen became available (I take four pills before bed) –  so I made an appointment to talk to my doctor about it. I have no complaints about the cocktail I am taking, but I like the idea of reducing my medication from four pills daily to one for a couple of reasons. Firstly, med adherence is important to the success of one’s treatment. Sometimes I will run out of one of my four pills and realize it too late and have to skip a dose. Secondly, I noticed that I liked the idea of taking one pill because it felt more like taking a vitamin or supplement. When I mentioned this to my doctor, he said he knew of studies that show that when you don’t feel like you are taking meds, you actually don’t see yourself as sick. Anyone who knows me knows I’m all about the power of the mind. It feels empowering to me to have investigated these new options and be making a decision about choices.
• Even though I’m in media I am usually on a media fast or at least a strict diet. The information I need always trickles down to me.
• I do the things that bring me joy. I refuse to do anything I don’t want to do. That makes me seem difficult to some but it’s about your happiness, no one else’s.
• I’m super-careful about the company I keep, and who I allow into my circle. This is about looking at whether someone is an uplifter for you, or drags you down.
• I’m careful about how I speak to myself. Someone I know the other day described herself aloud as “slow” and not even in a light-hearted way. I would never do that, and if I did I’d catch it and re-frame what I meant. Your mind believes what you tell it.

Lastly, I am gentle on myself when I fall off the wagon on all of the above, because I do. Some days are better than others. And it’s important for me to also say that once a party boy, always a party boy. I still like to over-indulge, to party, to fall off the grid, and throw caution to the wind and I think I always will. I don’t beat myself up about any of this, but instead move back to balance as soon as I’m feeling I’m too far off.

I’ve come to understand that when I do any of this, that I’m just someone always trying his best to feel happy. And staying happy – no matter what – is, as far as I’m concerned, the #1 way I have maintained long-term health.

– Shaun Proulx is the founder and publisher of GGN. Follow him on Twitter and watch is 2013 World AIDS Day 2013 television special, here. Image: Patrick Marano

* This is not medical advise. Consult your doctor before trying any of the health practices described here.

The post HIV :: Positive And Healthy appeared first on TheGayGuideNetwork.com.

THE RESULTS ARE IN :: Yesterday was the first time that I went for a real HIV test. I’ve had blood work done at my family doctor in the past, and I have been SUCH a good boy, but it was still one of the scariest things I’ve ever had to do in my life!

The questions they ask you when you’re there are the kind that you react to with a nervous laugh, even though you should be taking all of it seriously. Maybe I’m a child, but I burst out laughing when they shoot off ten questions, each of with having to do with bare-backing, cum, lube, bottoming, and multiple partners.

Then they prick your finger, take blood, leave the room for what seem to be the longest five minutes of your life, come back, tell you everything is fine, give you a lollipop, and you leave. Or at least that’s what happened yesterday for me. It’s scary to think that some people don’t get let off so easy. People actually go in with the same intentions that I did, think they’re fine, but their test comes back positive. Having HIV is not a life-sentence, but it’s definitely something that is preventable, and I encourage all of you to do your best to be the best responsible sexual partners you can be. Yes, I’m preaching. Honesty is the best policy!

I know my dad’s probably reading this, and it’s not like I’ve said tamer things about guys or my sex life on this blog or on television in the past, but I can honestly admit to being an extremely smart and careful sexual partner. I’m as hot-blooded as any other guy, but I know that being safe is the smartest thing to do! So, get tested regularly everyone. They give you a friggin’ lollipop for Madonna’s sake!

– Philip Tetro

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VIDEO :: Enjoy this special episode of The Shaun Proulx Show today, World AIDS Day, on TheGayGuideNetwork.com.

Says Proulx, who hosts and executive produced the show: “This isn’t  just for HIV stakeholders, this show is for anyone dealing with circumstances in their lives that result in judgement – from self or others. Anyone dealing with ageism, sexism, racism, body fascism, people with money problems, relationship problems – everyone, in other words – will relate to the conversation we’re presenting. It’s a conversation that is ultimately about taking the circumstances of your life – whatever they are – and the empowerment that comes from seeing them differently than you might have ever before.”

Please share this with others, and join the conversation on Twitter using @ShaunProulx / #ThoughtRevolution.

The post World AIDS Day 2013 :: The Shaun Proulx Show Special Episode appeared first on TheGayGuideNetwork.com.

I should have explained that he could catch the virus that causes my disability.  I just didn’t care though; I was drunk and horny and if he wanted it bare, fine.  Besides, why do I always have to be the responsible one?  The sex was great and what kills me, what irks the hell out of me, is he spent the night in my arms and made me breakfast in the morning.

A few days later and two cops are at my door.  They arrest me, put me in handcuffs, and lead me through my apartment building.  I was going to run for the condo board; guess that’s not going to happen now.  At the station, I’m told that Robert has laid changes because I “withheld information from him”.  They questioned me for hours about what happened and why I agreed to bareback.  I tried to argue that it was his idea and that he should have known the risks.  Apparently though, I have a responsibility to always disclose.  The humiliation got worse when I was made to be photographed naked.  I’ll never forget the smirk on the officers’ faces when they helped me get undressed.  I spent the night in jail and made bail the next morning, but not before a press release was sent out urging other people I’ve been with to come forward.  Now, I’m too ashamed to even go to the corner store.  I just sit at home and wonder what will happen next….

This is entirely fictional.  Indeed, it is absolutely impossible for anyone to catch cerebral palsy (my brain did not get enough oxygen at birth).  I hope you see the ludicrously of the situation and the double standard I would have faced.  If we replace CP with HIV/AIDS, the situation becomes all too real.  The criminalization of HIV positive people having sex is ableism at its worst.  It’s the state essentially denying people the right to make mistakes, the right to be horny, the right to have sex without prosecution, based on a medical condition.  It’s no different than saying I cannot vote because I can’t mark the ballot myself.    Criminalizing HIV  also an incredibly stupid public health policy.  Safe sex used to involve joint responsibility and communication.  

– Colin Philips

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DISCLOSING HIV STATUS :: In September, TheGGN publisher Shaun Proulx,  on CBC’s Metro Morning that he was diagnosed HIV-positive in 2005. In doing so, he caused an outpouring of emotional response, topical reaction, and began fresh new dialogue not only about HIV/AIDS, but the stigma and judgement we each face from others daily, and how to live joyfully and successfully happy – despite it all.

Related Reading: Proulx’s husband, Patrick Marano, faces his own propensity to judge others – sometimes over and over.

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